Saturday, August 4, 2012

6 MONTHS

6 Months today since Jayden stop breathing while he was taking his nap.  my heart still broken today, but the last 2 months have been so hard.  i have felt so much pain that for  the past week I have been working on been ready for this weekend; I have been gentle, I have been exercising, running mostly and eating comfort dessert and stay away from stupid people who can make painful comments.  Now at 14 weeks pregnant I'm terrify for the future of this baby.  Last year when I was pregnant at this time I was so excited I had found out it was a boy and I could not be more thrilled and excited since I remember I wanted so much to have a boy. Today I'm excited but the excitement is so limited because of the fear, because I have to accept that I have taken a risk of loosing this baby.  I have gotten 3 different opinions with different ME's. I have met with three ifferent pediatrics ad till no answer.  Still no one has any idea of what happen to my baby.  Im a believer of medicine but its so painful to not know what happen.  And even tough everyone says you did everything right I feel I mess up somewhere.  if not my baby would be here.


No comments:

Post a Comment